Monday, February 28, 2011

Update # 11: The Beauty of Perfection

I will finish the fangirl series.  I will.

This I wrote while listening to some mellow songs on Grooveshark. It especially reminds me of the song Soft Skeletons by Anberlin.  (Parenthetically, I love Grooveshark.  You should follow me if you have an account, and I'll follow you.  Yay connections!)
I imagine Alyssa might write a poem like this, if she were artsy and more sensitive and wrote poems and danced and smiled for real every once in a while.  She won't, isn't and doesn't though, so this isn't about her.  I just got that impression.  Maybe it's because she reminds me of Soft Skeletons too?
Oh.  I guess I still haven't put Hitchhiker up here.
Well, for those of you who have read Hitchhiker, that Alyssa.
I'll have to put it up soon for the rest of you... I do really want to finish it.


The Beauty of Perfection
February 28, 2011

A beautiful princess
In a world of soft diamond
In alcoves, through doorways
Up marble stairs, whitened

Dance and twirl a dizzy swirl
Laugh and smile without a care
I am deceiving myself
Poison pervades the air

Sunday, February 27, 2011

I'm Almost Ashamed Of Shamelessly Accusing You... Oh Wait, No I'm Not.

Once upon a time--
Once upon a time starts off to many stories.  For the sake of clarity, we'll start this one off differently.
A while ago, a girl was born.  This girl grew up doing odd things other little girls didn't do, like playing video games, and playing in mud, and drawing obsessively, and playing pretend because the other universe was just as real to her as the one her real acquaintances lived in.  This girl grew up and became a teenager, and discovered writing, which became imperative to who she was.
This girl had friends who were curious as to what she wrote, so this girl started a web blog to keep her friends up to date.
Anxiously the girl waited for her friends to post and comment on her blog, but she received a minimal amount of comments.  These she held tightly in her hands and tried to be grateful for the comments she had received instead of wanting more, wanting for people to respond to the writing that made up such a large part of her life.  The girl found this very hard.
She kept listening to her friends wail-- okay, I'm done. Parables aren't direct enough for this, even if it is blatantly obvious who the girl is.
Ya'll keep telling me that you don't comment cuz you can't figure it out.  That's the reason of this post.
Honestly, I wish I could say I'm not ashamed.  Maybe it's just cuz I'm from a family of computer nerds who try to impress each other by finding better links to nowhere and  memorizing new keyboard shortcuts, but gosh, guys, it's the internet.  Nothing new.
But since apparently a lot of you can't figure it out or haven't tried, I'll outline it for you. It's so easy I'm typing it from memory.  If this doesn't get me some more comments, then I'll just have to admit all of my friends don't really care that much.  Or all of your computers spontaneously combusted at the same time.  Which-- call me an unbeliever-- I seriously doubt for some reason. [/shameless guilt trip]

Friday, February 25, 2011

So... Hi again.

Oh, frabjous day~ Callou, callay~
I'm so happy right now.  Why, you ask?  Well, there are several reasons...


This is not so incredible in and of itself, but when considering the fact I had my wisdom teeth taken out on Monday, the simple consumption of bread and turkey is a marvelous, marvelous thing.
It wasn't easy, and it took me around twenty minutes, tearing it up, but still.
You have no idea how sick of sweet mushy stuff a girl can get in three days. Most of my conversations with my mom went like this:
Me: "Mom, I'm hungry."
Mom: "Well, what do you want?  We have ice cream, applesauce, and pudding."
Me: "Nooooooooooooo" *cry*
I was craving real food so bad, but there wasn't anything I could do.
Until now.  Bwahahaha.
I apologize for not writing sooner, but pain meds make you feel kind of floaty and sleepy, so I wasn't all here enough to post.  I trust any of you who have had your wisdom teeth cut out sympathize.
And those of you who don't, well... your time will come. *Cue creepy music*

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day to you all!  I realize I'm a little late, but hey, it's the thought that counts, right?
We can pretend, anyhow.

Yesterday morning I was moping.  I had just heard that my heartthrob Adam Young had professed his love to Taylor Swift in honor of Valentine's Day, and I was bummed out. I was feeling exactly why my dear Purple Hippo Girl calls February 14th Single Awareness Day.  I consumed copious amounts of chocolate and tried not to wail, "Why can't you see? You belong with me..."
Actually, I might have wailed it once or twice.
But moving on.
I was moping because I had not a valentine.  And part of me was like, "Heck, Christina, what would you do with a valentine?  It's not like you can have one just for a day, so you don't feel lonely while everyone else is being happy because they're in love."
And the other part was like, "Maybe if I eat 17 Reese's Cups that voice will just die and leave me alone in my miserable aloneness."
So I did, and then I dragged myself around my empty house forlornly, pitying the misery that was I. I put on Relient K's CD Forget and Not Slow Down and consoled myself with the thought that at least Matt Thiessen was lonely like me this Valentine's Day.  That didn't help (and wasn't overtly nice, though true), so I decided I'd start in on my homework, but I was feeling unproductive and almost fell asleep several times over the Aeneid.

I was really feeling the 'Guess I'll go eat worms' vibe.

I headed downstairs just because my family was back from the random places it went that morning, and while I was downstairs I realized:  "What the heck am I doing?  This is stupid.  Why am I moping for no reason?"
I put down my chocolate and decided I would email some friends the cutest love song in the universe.  Then I heard Mom was heading to the store, and I decided to tag along.  I was going to do something, dang it.  Valentine's Day would not stop me.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Pausing for Update #10: perfunctory.

This came from musing about those things we say that we don't really mean... you know, the ones where someone says it and you have to catch yourself before saying, "You liar."  'Cos honestly, hey, you can say "I'm sorry" but if they're just words, what's the point?  Not only are you lying, but you don't care.
Yeah, I know.  It's a little sadistic. ^_^

February 5, 2011

you say things like this
all the time
things like
                I don’t know who you are anymore
                                                Find yourself
                                                                                I miss you
but you say them without thinking
without blinking
they’re just words
that serve you
until you think about what they mean

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Fangirling: A Definition

So I started this off last post saying that a fangirl ought to be pitied.
You non-fangirls are going, “No, you should pity us.  We have to put up with them.”
Let me explain by first defining a fangirl.  Then we’ll work up, through this post and consequent others, to why the fangirl ought to, indeed, be pitied more than any other creature.

A fan is, by definition, “an enthusiastic devotee, follower, or admirer of a sport, pastime, celebrity” (
Given this definition, I will create my own of a fangirl:  “an (often overly) enthusiastic female devotee, follower, admirer, or worshiper of a celebrity, idea or object, frequently given to extremes.  Usually come in packs.”

Don’t have an image yet?  Let me help you out. 

Friday, February 4, 2011

Fangirling: An Introduction

“Oh, so you’re a fan, then?” They always ask.
“Yeah!”  I reply.  “Well, more of a fangirl, really.”

For the record, my friends, that oh shouldn’t be an oh of oh, a fangirl.  That should be an oh of sympathy, an oh of pity, an oh of understanding.  An oh, you poor darling.

Well, that’s precisely the topic we’ll explore these next few blog posts!  I feel as though the fangirl is an understudied wildlife that needs more attention.  (You needn’t know I am one to accept this.)
Exploration of the Fangirl Species will be organized thusly:
1.       Definition of a fangirl & an example
2.       Fangirl subspecies
3.       Fangirl social interactions (including warring fangirldoms and general animosity explained)
4.       Things that attract fangirls
5.       In conclusion: Why a fangirl should be pitied

I hope you enjoy this deeply scientific journey we're about to embark on!
They're taking the hobbits to Isengard,

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Update #9: Epoison

Happy February, you guys!  I hope yours is going better than mine.  I caught this nasty head-cold, and my February started out kind of tired, stuffy and irritable.
I wrote this the other night while listening to Falling Up's song Exhibition (Epoison).  I swear, if I can't write all I have to do is turn on some Falling Up and all of my problems solve themselves.

I love music artists for that. ♥

(I apologize beforehand because I realize it's kind of a pain to read.  I was trying something new, and whereas I like how it turned out, I realized some of you might hate me for it.  Oops. ^_^' )

February 1, 2011 

The metal shines
                                in the darkness
I press myself against it
                praying I become one with the icy panels, hiding in the black, watching your cameras
I hear them coming
My cover isn’t blown yet.  I grin to myself
what are you doing
You know where I am
Why do you rest?