Monday, February 7, 2011

Pausing for Update #10: perfunctory.

This came from musing about those things we say that we don't really mean... you know, the ones where someone says it and you have to catch yourself before saying, "You liar."  'Cos honestly, hey, you can say "I'm sorry" but if they're just words, what's the point?  Not only are you lying, but you don't care.
Yeah, I know.  It's a little sadistic. ^_^

perfunctory.
February 5, 2011

you say things like this
all the time
things like
                I don’t know who you are anymore
                                and
                                                Find yourself
                                                                and
                                                                                I miss you
but you say them without thinking
without blinking
they’re just words
that serve you
until you think about what they mean


you laugh and say
                I don’t know who you are anymore
without realizing
                                to not know anymore means
                                you did before
you knew someone
you knew them in every intricate detail of their being
                every peculiarity of the mind
                                every twist of the mouth
                                                every beat of the heart
you knew them like you knew yourself
                                                                                                but now you don’t

do you have any idea how incredibly sad
that is?

or to say
                Find yourself
is telling you you’re lost
is telling me I’m lost
and that we have to be found

                                be found…
                                                or what?

                                                                                lost is a terrible place to be

And crooning
                I miss you
to a stranger
a lover
a friend

missing is an ache
                                                a dull, throbbing pain, inside
                                craving nothing more than to be satisfied
                devouring

it cries

                                and you say you miss them
                you don’t even know what
missing means

but the most sad of all

the most painful

the most aching

the most heart wrenching
of all of them
is when you say

                I love you

because there is no way
                that can be anything
but
                                                                                                a lie
               

No comments:

Post a Comment